There comes a point in everyone’s life where we meet someone who makes our heart beat just a little faster and takes our breath away. But how do we know if the relationship we have is real love or merely infatuation? While there is no solid right or wrong when it comes to love, there are signs which might just point us to the answers we’re looking for.
- It isn’t sudden
While love can happen at the most unexpected of times, real love is usually built upon understanding, friendship and getting to know each other. Real love takes time to nurture whereas puppy love is a sudden burning desire to want that particular person based on his/her outwards appearance or superficial personality. Infatuation isn’t so much based on loving (or in this case, liking) the person for who he/she is but rather liking the skin-deep impression he/she gives you.
- There is compromise
When it comes to a relationship that’s founded on real love, you’ll find that there is always mutual compromise to solve an issue. When you’re infatuated however, you find yourself oblivious to the person’s flaws or shortcomings not because you’ve accepted him/her for who they are but rather because you are too blinded by your intense crush to even give a thought to the person’s bad points. While not picking out someone’s flaws is ideal, constantly looking past things that will make you upset in the long run just because you are “so in love” isn’t going to sustain a relationship. Compromising and understanding is essential to keep a couple from falling apart when it comes to real love.
Real love makes you feel secure. Simply because it took time, effort and understanding to nurture. You don’t need to be worried about your partner leaving for another person because you both know that this relationship is what you both want. Real love assures and gives you a sense of stability and security in knowing that even though there’s a billion people out there in this world, you’d still be the one. Infatuation on the other hand, goes as quickly as it comes. You’ll find yourself or your partner looking for someone else in a matter of months when that feeling of intense infatuation has faded. Real love directs you as a couple.
With real love, you love each other enough to make important decisions together and to do things with your partner’s feelings in consideration all because you are both aware that it isn’t a short-term thing and you want to be in each other’s lives if god-willing. With someone you deem as your life-partner, you know that every part of your business is just as much your partner’s business too. In contrary, infatuation does not take into consideration the other person’s feelings. You don’t feel the need to account for whatever that happens in your life and you do whatever makes you happy. You are pretty much individuals despite being in a relationship and you only want your partner there when you feel like it. In real love, a couple is as one, be it in good times or bad.
- It makes you a better person
Real love elevates. It moulds you to become a better person. You’ll find that you’re accepting to your partner’s constructive criticism and love doesn’t necessarily always standing by you. Your partner will tell you when you’ve done wrong and not take your side just because he/she is your other half. It makes you see yourself through another person’s eyes and be more aware of your characteristics such that you’ll want to change to be a better person. Infatuation is basically blind. Whatever that you might not agree regarding your partner’s actions is overlooked and negligent. It doesn’t make you a better person. It just makes you feel good and that isn’t always a good thing.
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